Five years ago around this time I was ghosted by my very very good fren of three years at the time because I sperged out and embarrassed him in front of his cousins.
Something happened that put my heda in that stressed out sperg mode and I just started acting in a paranoid and bizarre way. In this sperged out state I cannot fully control my behavior and bad things end up happening. I think it has to be because of all the sufferings I have been through over the years which have fugged my brain. I know it sounds really disgusting and Reddit tier but it's true.
I have never had a friend who was so on the same wavelenght as me and so similar in almost every way. Interests, opinions, life settis, everything. We had so much fun together. I also introduced him to imageboards which sucked him in instantly.
We would have had so much more fun over these five years of being frens and still more would be ahead. I would have done much better in crypto and work and all fugging things in life (except getting a gf which is impossible). Great discussions of world events and the gayness of life would have been had. But it's don't.
Why must I always suffer? I know that what happened was my own fault but from a certain POV of view it was also a terrible misunderstanding and it should never have happened.
Do things like this happen to any other Bernd? Probably not tbh.
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