There is always something that you have from your childhood, but forgot. Try to reconnect with it. Find an old album with photos, a book you used to read as a child, something you used to hold in your hands, it must be something material, maybe a toy, a diary. not digital. Find it, sniff it and try to remember how you held it in the past, what thoughts run through your head, what concerned you most back there, what was your highest expectations and hopes for the future. Its how our brains work, you will resurrect some old memories. i hope it will be something positive that will ground you, allow you to put current events in the context of the wider framework of understanding
but if it will be something bad...well, it couldn't be worse than this movie plot