I know that feel. I once attempted to grow a full beard, but the growth was nonexistent on my cheeks so I gave up and shaved it all away, I wanted a proper full beard or nothing. I'll try again in 10 years and hopefully there would be some growth then. The growth was only powerful around the mouth, oh well at least I can grow a gigantic moustache.
After cutting the beard and seeing myself in the mirror it took weeks to get adjusted to that ugly face, I looked like a baby.