Is losing weight noticeable? I mean, can you see the difference in life due to weight loss already? Compared to what it was 10 years ago.

get a job, become sheep

Pet ferret 2025.

 

I am only half joking, it has been my driving force for a decade. Simple wishes for a simple Bernd, I am too pessimistic about life and my future to dream any bigger.

My plan for the past decade has been to start a family. As it stands, I'm guessing it'll never progress beyond the planning phase.

Yes, I lost 20kg for a while and it was very nice.

Sadly compared to 10 years ago I had a netto gain in weight.. fuck me.

good plan

 

i'd like to have cockatiels, but that would limit my ability to kys if things turn bad, so I cant justify it

Next year: Finish education, marry gf.

Next few years: Enjoy life, travel a bit, find a good place to live, save money to start building a house.

When we are around 27: start a family.

 

Let's see if this will work out.

Doing nothing, if anything only death awaits me.

 

t.34 year old NEET

Now you know why cat ladies exist, that’s the point of pets for Bernd-types.

 

I am sure I will kys when both my parents are buried if I don’t have a dependable of some kind. Morally keeping pets is wrong and based on that I’d prefer living without them, but what if they are the only thing keeping me alive, is it wrong to be a bit selfish?

How about forming bonds with other human-like beings? I saw so many lonely people of both sexes in my life with which I came in not shallow contact it's just unbelievable.

Tho it really does not cure the desire to be dead, but it helps not to be lonely and have someone to care after you. It can't be such people exist only on Russia. Cat ladies obviously can't form any not harmful bonds.

tbh I wouldn’t be on a imageboard to get my social fix if I could bond successfully with other humans.

How do you justify marrying someone? Aside from on Germany you'll pay less taxes.

Probably you're right. Don't know how Finnish internet for people who can't bond with other people really works. Here I can find many such places. No, MANY such places.

Such as? For Finns it’s Ylilauta, suomi24 or vauva.fi.

Ylilauta is an imageboard and suomi24 or vauva.fi is some kind of huge national forums?

I was talking about more niché places with fewer people in there and with some kind of registration/nickname system. Something like simple chats. Subject of the chat doesn't really matter.

 

I've been visiting one chat originated back in 2009 for like 10 years and saw how people found there each other and even form families. It is almost dead at this moment, but at peak performance I saw 15-20 people in there daily. Currently such chats are more dead than alive and people migrated to small communities in social networks(20-100 people) where they can have group chats. And I'm pretty sure they do the same thing there as years before: find casually someone they can talk comfortably with, get attached to each other with time, form a bond, leave the place.

Also I recall we have a service of instant messages with strangers here launched something 10 years ago, don't know how it is working today. The idea is: you write a simple message and a stranger receives it. You can't write any more messages before someone responds to you. Then, when someone responded, you talk like: he writes a message to you, then you write a message to him, you both can't change the order. If you don't like that person, you can abandon the convo and launch another message to nowhereness and find someone new to chat. That way I found a person I know for the last 10 years I guess, we were pretty close at times, however lived in different cities for almost 5 years.

Ah that kind of places. Used to love those small communities that watched movies together.

 

You seem quite adept with the finding friends thing, you must have an active social life?

 

My problem is the frequent bouts of depression and then ghosting anyone and everyone, having no energy for friendship upkeep. People take offense and are gone by the time I wake up from hibernation. That and my nasty personality, people have no reason to keep up with my bullshit. Ugly outside and ugly inside, life motto.

To clarify.

I'm having quite the same issues you have, at least it's what it was back when I still needed someone to talk to. I had very severe depressions. Once in a while I was abandoning all people I know and stick to someone comfortable at that moment, usually only one person. I'm pretty not outgoing person most of the time, and I've been having panic attacks just by visiting a café. Having conversations via e-mails where you can have messages of any length and writing them at moments when I feel comfortable to do so helped a lot.

 

I understand what you're talking about, it's very healthy kind of relationships between two people or more that have energy to be stable and comfort each other, but I think I was talking about the places with people who actually don't have such energy, in the very beginning. That's why these groups and chats are different from person-to-person communication: if you're absent, they can switch to someone else in the meantime, and you can be closer the moments when you actually need that. I guess it's silly to describe that with words, it's just how it happens sometimes when you get into the right place with the right people. And small communities tend to be more caring to each other and more comfortable places overall, so it must be less stress and entanglement.

 

Also depression is curable, well, if it's not about being blind forever and just about stress and spontaneous depression outrages. If you find someone with the same issues, you'll find a person that will be more tolerant to your issues with mood and personality. The downside is: you have to be caring and tolerant to their issue, too.

Thanks for the chat, will reply tomorrow. Getting too exhausted and sleepy to write anything at length, as your well-thought responses deserve.

G-d night.

I got a cockmail address at [email protected]

I need more people to direct my autism towards because I think my friends are getting tired of me talking about trains.

 

But on a serious-ish note, I do kind of want to help people feel less like shit. I remember how ass my bouts depression used to feel, and I wish I had someone to talk to at those points.

 

Anyway, feel free to call me gay.

That feel when your healthcare system isn't free and you can't get a state assigned buddy to talk to.

Thanks Bernd, I don’t have much to reply despite mulling over your posts today.

 

Depends on the severity, mild depression is common and people can have it and bounce back to ”normal human” later in life. Severe depression on the other hand, if untreated for long, destroys your brain and it’s like a pit you keep falling into forever from the smallest misstep. It never leaves your mind, it is always lurking, meds keep it somewhat in check but my god if you have sudden stress in life there we go again. The ride never ends.

 

It’s deep winter and spring is coming, things only go south from here. Do you know the feel?

Yeah. I used the word “curable” to simplify things, meaning you have to take meds your entire life once you get to the point where you need any meds. And therapy, and freaking out time to time. In my humble opinion it's a payment to avoid the hell of complete mental and physical paralysis. At least there is an option.

 

Yes, I interrupt all the contacts when it's literally cold outside, somehow it reflects in my psychological state, and when the weather becomes bearable, at least even small warmth gets back, I start to regain contacts back. Once I broke up with a person in late Autumn because it wasn't possible to sustain connectivity when winter comes, I decided to not waste her time, it was very difficult to explain my reasoning.

this

Seasonal Affective Disorder is a pain. You perk up with spring?

 

Long ago I read somewhere that suicides happen the most in spring and I totally get it now. The nature and everyone around you wakes up, while you are on your last leg, not ready for the warm breeding season. Must be a hormonal thing or instinct, to weed out the weaklings that cannot survive winter.

Not particularly at spring, but at any season when I sense a little warmth in the air. I'm originally from the though of the country and we have very mild springs and winters there, I grew up very sensible to weather changes. Today is the first warm day in this winter here on the north where I'm living for the past 5 years. And this day is the first day in the whole winter when I can breath at least a little bit freely. It's finally a relief.

 

I've noticed that too. Nature doesn't not forgive, nature does not forget, lol. I've read several monographs on suicidal behaviour. Unfortunately there are more mass suicide triggers than only seasonal depression, but that one is most deadliest.

Just figured out. You have that thing too? If yes, how does it go with you?

That's how you start a family, no?

Probably. I've not started a family to be sure. But it seems like marrying someone isn't the only way to start a family, answering your question. But I've got the idea why you are going to marry her.

why do women take photos like this?

Because we love each other, she will get my surname, we are both still somewhat religious and we will pay less taxes.

 

Isn't this basically why people marry?

Because Chad Thundercock might see it.

I turned 30 in december. Feels strange. Im now as close to 20 as i am to 40 and still i feel like a little kid.

 

After this corona shit is over i try to get GF to finally create a family. Will surely be hard since i am kiss and GFless since ever.

Not, it isn't. There are many reasons why people do that. Well, not that much for Bernds, but more than 2 for Bernadettes.

 

Me too. Will you be looking at any age or do you have preferences?

I see myself in prison, living as a hermit in the woods, dying during my travels or going back to uni to unfuck my life.

I will be 34 yo and I had enough of Brazil, so, I will try have a new life in Portugal working at shitty jobs making only the bare minimum to survive.

I have no hope for tomorrow.

plis explain

Women engage to marriage for many reasons: to feel secure, to have kids with particular man, to have social status of a married woman, because of love, to lessen social pressure from relatives and society as an unmarried woman, because they were told it's right to do so. Those all are different reasons, women separate them, I just asked some women why they could marry someone, talked with a psychologist about that as well and that what I've got in response.

I wouldn't dare to think I definitely know why one or another woman decided to marry me.